


Acquisitions

by Azhwi, LosttotheHoping



Series: The Tenten & Kakuzu Shrine [3]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Business, F/M, Swearing, WIP, because Hidan
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-13
Updated: 2019-01-12
Packaged: 2019-10-09 06:30:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,892
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17401781
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Azhwi/pseuds/Azhwi, https://archiveofourown.org/users/LosttotheHoping/pseuds/LosttotheHoping
Summary: Her family really did have business on the brain. Always.(Re-posting for structure)





	Acquisitions

The problem with going out with family for tea was not that Tenten didn’t love her family, but that the family was always thinking of acquisitions. There wasn’t anything wrong, per se, about constantly having work on their minds, and she was entirely aware that as she was expected to be the same, but it made for some awkward situations.

If she was with her cousins, sometimes tea cups and silverware would go missing off the table. That was  _only_  if they weren’t out with any of the older generations, because if there was a hint of sticky fingers while at the table, the culprit, once caught, would be forced to clean the bathrooms for a week. As in, all the bathrooms in the entire compound and there were quite a few.

Not that the older generation was any better. They didn’t lift little material things, but they would walk away with anything from art pieces to deeds of properties to contracts. The contracts were the worse, because that meant they had assumed possession of  _lives_.

Living people were always complicated to accommodate. Most needed training, either to improve the skills the family had wanted them for or simply to get used to working for the family business. If training wasn’t a factor, well all of them needed adjusting.

Tenten would be the first to admit that she had no experience with picking out potential additions, and while she could appreciate the benefits of bringing in fresh eyes to a project, she didn’t have the knack for looking at a person and knowing immediately where and how they would fit into their efforts.

Something which her aunt was rather gifted at.

The first sign that something had piqued Aunt Serene’s interest was the way her dark eyes narrowed over her teacup as her gaze snagged somewhere behind and to the left of Tenten. Then Tenten found herself receiving bland answers and flippant questions. Finally, her aunt had given up on conversation altogether and had sent out several text messages in quick succession.

Honestly, if she didn’t love her aunt so much, she’d be offended that business had interrupted yet another family visit.

“Idea, person, or thing?” Tenten asked once her aunt had put down her phone with a satisfied grin.

“A person,” Serene answered, tracing a finger tip on the edge of a plate, eyes back to watching. “He’s forceful, but skillful enough to out maneuver his opponent.”

Leaning back, Tenten frowned. “We don’t need another negotiator, do we?”

“Your grandfather doesn’t think so, but I’m seeing someone who could do more than Hyuuga with less time wasted,” Serene said, thin brow arching. “Efficiency is a valuable trait.”

Tenten frowned. “You don’t like Neji-kun?” This was news to her. Last she heard, she was expected to  _marry_  the man. Last she heard, the family was happy enough with him.

Serene’s sharp gaze finally snapped back to Tenten. “I wouldn’t say I don’t like him” she demurred, “but that there is certainly room for improvement… in an area he has given no inclination to even contemplate.”

 _Huh_.

“So… why this guy then?” she asked instead. “You said forceful, but we’re in a tea shop and I don’t see any disruptions at all. I haven’t heard any raised voices. How did you even notice him?”

Waving a hand, Serene glanced down as her phone buzzed with another silent text. “I can read lips, dear. That and neither he or the one he’s talking to are bothering to hide their expressions.” Smirking as she read the message, her aunt shrugged. “While I’m not betting any of his expressions are all that he’s feeling, I’m sure his opponent’s has far less control. Ah… see? Here the loser is passing by a few tables over.”

Permission granted, Tenten glanced over, seeing a man of middling age, slender but graceless, march between the tables, angling for the staff rooms. Hmm.

“Table three windows left of the entrance, tall boy, dark hair, black jacket, blue shirt” Serene said, waving a hand. “Call him over, will you, Tenten?”

Huffing a little through her nose in resignation, Tenten rose from her seat and looked around for the man in question. Found him easily. Considering he was backlit from the late afternoon sunshine, she was surprised Serene had picked out the color from here. Then again, lip reading.

Oh, and another thing, he was watching her.

“Were you going to mention that you’d caught his attention already, Aunty Serene?” Tenten asked her, without turning.

“It certainly does speed things along, doesn’t it?”

Shaking her head, Tenten headed off without replying.

The man in black watched her approach with a frown, and she was wondering why Serene thought this was the best way to open negotiations. Surely he seemed irritated enough to brush off anything she said, so why?

“Hello,” she said, once she reached his table. “Could we talk for a moment, please?”

For a heartbeat, it didn’t look like he was going to answer, only scowl at her in annoyance.  Eventually, though, to her surprise he got to his feet and grabbed his water. “Lead the way, Miss Wei,” he growled lowly, nudging his chair back into its place.

“Thank you.” She nodded and turned, pacing back to her table, trying not to notice just how tall the man behind her was--six and a half, perhaps. Ahead of them, Serene had already talked the staff into bringing another chair and a place setting, shuffling the seats to accommodate. “Aunt Serene, your guest,” Tenten announced, motioning for the man to take the new seat. One that put his back against the wall as his other one had been situated.

He inclined his head to her aunt, pausing before taking the seat.  That was where the typical shows of respect stopped, though, and he cut to the chase, as it were.  “I assume you have a pitch. Let’s hear it.” Direct. Dauntless.

“We need a more assertive negotiator,” Serene replied, without a pause. “One who isn’t concerned with status nor influenced by assumed limitations, self-made or given. Our business was created from the dirt we had slept in. We need people who aren’t concerned with past failures or lineage, but focus on manipulating any situation to give the desired results.”

Apparently, what Serene wanted was a bull who could do headgames. Tenten sat back thinking. It wasn’t that Neji wasn’t getting things done, he had many contracts to his name and many of their successes were due to his efforts. However… there were a few projects that were stagnating because Neji’s attentions were elsewhere. Those must be the reason why Serene was headhunting.

Pale green eyes narrowed on Serene.  “And what, exactly, will I get out of it that will make it worth my time?” he asked flatly.

Serene arched a brow. “You make your own contacts, keep them as well, whether you stay with us or not. We only require you to sign a non-competition contract for while you are with us and three years post. You will be given benefits are per your station, as well as a pay that I can guarantee is worth the paperwork. Travel, if that is a temptation, will be covered by us completely if you can give us a reason to. Accommodations, plural or singular, can be provided as well as transportation--though the latter will be to a point.” She shrugged. “We accept the need to impress a potential client, but discourage showing off personal wealth.”

“If you have dependents,” Serene continued, “they will be provided for, though not indulged. Education is of course always something that will be encouraged, both in and out of the family business.”

“What I must stress is this. The family business must always be a priority, and we will have demands of your time, however, this should not affect your current lifestyle other than unburdening you of certain financial needs.” She laced her fingers together and gave him a smile. “So we will be caring for your needs until we need you, for however many times we may call.”

For almost 30 seconds, the boy was silent, expressionless.  “Two conditions,” he finally said, expression shifting slightly.  Whatever this new one was, it was unreadable to Tenten. “One notification.”  He held up two fingers. “Jashin Hidan and any extension thereof is utterly off limits for the duration of our association.  If he approaches you or yours on his own, that’s fine, but otherwise, I want no one going near him for anything beyond asking for his coffee order if they’re a barista.”  He put one finger down. “My finances and personal life remain that. Any employment for your family does not mean I am owned. Caring for my needs is unnecessary, but the consideration is appreciated should I decide to make use of it at a future junction.”

Nodding, Serene tipped a hand at him. “There will need to be the standard criminal screening through your records, but that will be done by a governmental contract. We will see nothing but a yes or no if there is anything of note. And that will be as far as we will go regarding your personal life and finances. As to your person of note and his assets,” Serene paused, blinking slowly. “I am willing to withhold advances, however, should the family see that approaching would be a benefit to both parties, would it be acceptable to send the proposal to you? As well as… professional advice?” She shrugged. “I am not saying you will be speaking for him, but we will give you the option of stopping the proposal before contact is made.”

Implying that he could cut Hidan off from any kind of business advancement without Hidan knowing anything at all.

Although his reaction was peculiar; that was definitely amusement that flashed over his face.  “I think you misunderstand, Ms. Wei. I don’t make that stipulation out of concern for him- he does as he wishes, and no one can stop him.  That’s the problem. He can’t be controlled. It wouldn’t be worth the effort for you to approach him. But if you want it that way, I am amenable.”

There was still something though… “You mentioned a notification as a requirement,” Tenten spoke up, drawing both their attentions. “What does that refer to?”

His gaze shifted to her, more assessing than previously.  “Less a requirement, more of a… heads up. I meet violence with violence, and I have a temper.  Unlike Hidan, I’m not out of control… but things happen.” He didn’t quite shrug, but it was a near thing.  “I don’t deal well with bullshit.”

The smile Serene flashed him was more teeth than politeness called for. “We do appreciate the warning,” she said, looking far more satisfied than Tenten expected. “We have a negotiator with us at present, of course. However, he will walk away from a threat of bodily harm. If you would meet them and  _push back_ , that will already make you a greater asset.”

Tenten tried to hide the wince, but considering the way the man’s eyes flickered her way before focusing back on her aunt, she probably failed. The incident Serene was referring to was one where the client had brought in thugs to sweeten his end of the deal. Neji had deflected the damage, but had afterwards refused to deal with them. Even if it was only to declare a breach of contract followed by their own show of force. In the end, someone else had gone in his place.

That someone had been Tenten.

“Good,” he said, looking just as satisfied.  “My name is Chuushin Kakuzu. You may use my given name, as may Miss Wei.”  A dark brow arched. “Do you have any questions?”

Serene shook her head. “Nothing more for now.” Passing over a card of cream card stock and emerald print, she smiled. “Here is my contact information. Send me an email once you have a moment, and I will reply back with a proper contract with the additional clauses. Tenten may be the one following up from there on, but I will be available for questions.”

Slanting a glance towards Serene, Tenten arched a brow, but brought out her personal card as well. “Here,” she said, handing it over to him. Plain white and black, nothing fancy, it held only half the text her aunt’s did. “Thank you for your consideration.”

He took both cards and tucked them away, standing.  “Hm. Good day,” he said, perfunctorily, and was out the door seconds later.  He didn’t glance back.

“You really think he’s worth all that?” Tenten muttered, motioning for the staff to refill the teapot. “Offering to fund his life just because he’s a wrecking ball in negotiations?”

Lifting up her phone, Serene smiled. “He didn’t take the offer, as he felt that would put himself too far into our debt. He asked for protection of his friend, perhaps lover, but not for himself. For that matter, he offered up his assumed weakness, putting his chances with the family at risk.” She paused as the pot was filled and waved off the queries for additional fare. “If you don’t see that he’s more than first impressions by the end of the month, I really don’t know what to think of you.”

Tenten rolled her eyes and wagged a finger at her aunt. “All those points, he only brought those up  _after_  you offered to pay his way. What aren’t you telling me?”

Serene’s smile widened. “Why, he’s Chuushin Kakuzu, dear. You think we hadn’t already heard of his exploits by now? Setting up a chance meeting isn’t easy, but I’m very glad I was the one to finally meet him.”

“What?” Tenten nearly spilled tea on her lap. “You knew of him already?”

“He was very active in Ame before coming to Konoha,” Serene mused. “I wonder what made him migrate.”

Tenten rubbed a hand over her face. “Maybe because your headhunters in  _Ame_  made him nervous.”

Serene snorted. “Oh, we never made it that far,” she said. “Didn’t bother, really. Not enough local clout that far away from home.”

Again, Tenten glanced heavenwards. “As if we’ve never reached that far before for lesser reasons.”

“Ah, but the important and  _interesting_  ones are worth treating cautiously.”

“ _This_  is what you call cautious?”

Graceful and calm, Serene poured them both a cup. “Two women, one clearly a junior, having tea. Of course we’re a tentative offer. Would either of us be able to force an answer from him?”

Tenten wrinkled her nose and decided to just drink the damn tea. Her family really did have business on the brain. Always.

xXx

Hidan was swearing up a storm when Kakuzu grabbed him from the tank, where he’d spent the night.  This wasn’t exactly abnormal. “The fuck’d you have to show up  _now_!  You left me in that fucking shithole all fucking night, you  _dick_ , and  _now_  is when you show up!  It was just getting good!”

“I have no fucking interest in your proclivities, Hidan, shut the fuck up and get in the car,” Kakuzu growled irritably, tired of the sound of his whining.  He shoved his best friend into the passenger’s seat, and slammed the door behind him before circling the car.

Visibly, Hidan was still bitching, and the tirade became once again audible the second Kakuzu opened the driver’s side door.  “-took you so long anyway? You shack up with a harem or some shit?!”

It was only through Kakuzu’s iron will that he didn’t break the idiot’s face right there in the police station parking lot.  It would have saved them on gas, at least. “Fuck you.”

“You first!”  Hidan grabbed a can of soda out of the glove box and opened it, chugging as Kakuzu pulled out of the lot.  Once he pulled it away, though, his eyes flicked over Kakuzu and he huffed. “Damn, you’re bitchier than usual.  Who the fuck did you con?”

Kakuzu turned a corner with a bit more force than strictly necessary.  “I wasted a favor on your stupid ass,” he growled, but huffed out a sigh.  “Still, the risk was worth it. Even if they did set your ass up.”

The idiot, mid-gulp, choked.  “What? Who fucking set me up!?”

“That information will cost you.”

“Fu-uck you.”

Smiling, Kakuzu slowed for a light.  Even if the employment aspect wouldn’t work, the game was almost worth the trouble.  That Ms. Wei was shrewd, and her niece was easy on the eyes, not to mention pretty quick on the uptake herself.

This was going to be  _fun_.

“Holy fucking  _shitballs_ , stop that!”

“Fuck?”

“You’re smiling.  It’s fucking creepy as shit.”

… He may, however, need to decline on account of being imprisoned for murder.

xXx

Rubbing a hand over her mouth, Tenten read over the email from Chuushin again, as well as the commentary Serene had left in bright green text.

_Crafty, is certainly the word for him. He and Serene should never have met._

He had questioned a few clauses in the contract that hadn’t been mentioned and since then Tenten had been shoved to the side as Serene answered him, snapping back at his scathing phrases. It had been a miniature skirmish done in black and green text with Tenten acting as the bemused and troubled fly on the wall.

Back and forth they had gone, for a month. Four and a half weeks, an email almost every other day, if you averaged out the heavy barrage of emails some weeks and near arctic silence with the others.

If this was what it cost to bring in talented people, Tenten was just as happy to observe and not fuck things up.

For all that she was insisting she was handling it well, Serene treated Chuushin like a belligerent younger sibling, genius though he was. It was  _very_ strange. Tenten chalked it up to business tactics and left her to it.

Though now… Chuushin had calmed enough to allow the contract to stay as it was since its last edition. Serene had refrained from sneaking in extra addendums.

Chewing on the end of a licorice stick, Tenten tapped fingers lightly over the keyboard. Not hard enough to leave words, but enough to give her the sound of the keys. Maybe it would give her inspiration if not incentive.

_Right, this is ridiculous._

> “Chuushin,
> 
> Here is the final draft of the contract. No changes have been made since you last spoke with Serene. After looking it over, please sign and date it electronically and email it back. If you have more questions, I’ll let Aunt Serene know.
> 
> Thank you.
> 
> Wei, Tenten.”

_And attach… and send._

She picked up her mug of tea and stared moodily at the previously email. Serene’s vivid green pecked at Chuushin’s every assertion for change. Good god, she did not want her aunt’s job. This was stressful just reading it.

 _Wonder if there’s any good movies on tonight._  She picked up her phone and sent a text to Ino for coffee and shopping.  _I think I’ve had enough of family business for tonight._

xXx

“Tenten!” Ino’s familiar voice called out, cutting clear through the boisterous chatter of the food court.  Most people ignored her, but it was enough for Tenten to see her friend had brought company. A familiar Hyuuga girl dogged Ino’s steps.  The blonde was grinning enough for all three of them. “Look who I found outside!”

“Hi, Tenten,” Hyuuga Hinata said with a smile and a wave. “I hear you needed therapy shopping?”

“Uh. I didn’t say  _therapy_ ,” Tenten replied dubiously, though she reached out to give both her friends a hug. “At least, I don’t think I did?”

“No, I’m just a wizard,” Ino said into her shoulder, and grinned as she stepped back.  “And your texts screamed ‘I’ve been dealing with family’, a vibe I’m well versed in.”

Laughing, Tenten leaned back in to bump shoulders with the blonde. “In that case, you’re a genius, I’m so glad you’re my friend, and oh god, can we please get ice cream right now? Because I have a need, okay? A  _need_.”

Hinata perked right up. “I think I saw a mint mocha flavour at the Dairy’s. How about that?”

“Yes. Just, yes.”

Ino laughed and lead the veritable charge.  She stumbled to a halt abruptly, mid-power-walk, and backtracked to look into a store, nearly running into Hinata.  “Oh my god, look at those shoes.”

With Hinata snagged by the elbow, Tenten rolled her eyes and  walked around her gaping friend. “Yes, they are rather pointy. Go on, try them on. We’ll be in the food court.” True to threat, Tenten marched off, a giggling Hinata trotting along.

There was ice cream to be had. Shoes could wait twenty minutes, dammit.

Ino hastened after them quickly, though.  “Oh, sorry. Don’t be mad, you know I have an illness!” she said with a grin, hooking her arm through Hinata’s free one.  The food court came into sight, and she hummed. “Do you think they have the lactose free ones? Those are better for my diet…”

Groaning, Tenten mocked slumping against Hinata, head hanging just a bare inch over her shoulder. “Diets? You wanna talk about diets? Okay, I’ll give you mine.” Tenten saw Ino lean around Hinata with arched brows. “Protein and veggies. No carbs. I just managed to talk my way free of it for today.”

The blonde gave her a flat look.  “Your life is insane. Oh, speaking of insane, look at the insanely gorgeous man meat!” she said in a suddenly hushed voice.  “Too bad he’s blond. I don’t date other blonds.”

“Uh uh, I ain’t interested in man meat, I only want--Oh. Huh. Oh  _shit_.” Tenten slipped out of Hinata’s soft hold and turned for the nearest nook. It didn’t matter it if was a store for children’s stuffed toys; she was desperate. Whoever the blond guy was that Ino had seen, it didn’t matter, because Chuushin was standing right next to him. Talking. In front of Starbucks.

“Tenten?” Hinata’s sweet voice called from the front of the store.

Someday later, Tenten would recall this moment and feel slightly ashamed of hiding by the display of plush donkeys. Maybe. Maybe not. She was pretty sure any encounter with Chuushin and his ilk were unfortunate for the other party. “In here, Hina. I’m looking at… asses.”

“Not the asses I’m looking at,” Ino replied from her spot by the store.  “Oops.” She ducked in to join Tenten with a guilty smile. “Sexy man spotted me.  I don’t think Creepy Goth did, though. Plus for me. Sheesh, he knows Halloween’s over with right?”

Tenten choked on a laugh. Yeah, calling Chuushin a goth was pretty broad brushed, but considering he was all done up in black, he probably deserved the melodramatic cliche. “As long as he’s not coming over here, I don’t care if he’s painted up like Kiss.”

Over by the fairies, Hinata muffled a giggle. “If he were dressed up as a clown you’d have a different opinion,” she said innocently.

It was a very near thing that Tenten didn’t pelt her dear friend with a stuffed bee.  _I hate clowns_. Instead, she settled for scowling. “The guy with your blond is someone my family just signed on. I’ve been staring at his contract for the past month, Ino.  _A month_.”

“Urg,” Ino replied eloquently.

“Heh.  That explains a fucking lot.”

The shrieks could be heard from  _space._  “What the hell?!” Tenten yelled, once she caught herself from jumping straight into a shelf. Hinata meanwhile was no help, because she was laughing her fool head off two aisles down.  _I can hear you, Hinata. And I plan righteous retribution!_

Ino’s reaction, meanwhile, was to punch the idiot in the head.  The albino - red eyes, colorless hair - stumbled back and tripped over a toy display.  She paled. “Oh god, I’m-”

His moan cut her right off.  “Damn, what a right hook… Fuck me.”

“Right,” Tenten hauled herself up and snagged Ino. “Don’t care. We’re going.”

Hinata peeked around the end cap of butterflies, red cheeked and grinning. “Fleeing the scene of the crime?”

“Bet your ass we are. Move it, girls.”

“Wha- hey wait!   Don’t I get your number!?” he called after them.

Ino laughed.  “Nope!” she chirped, loud enough that Tenten heard her as she and Hinata were exiting the shop.

“Miss Wei?”

Tenten didn’t quite bite back the whimper that escaped her then, but it was a valiant effort. “Hello, Chuushin. We’re just leaving.” She smiled and smiled and smiled. Right up to the point where the idiot in the back decided to speak up.

“You know ‘er?  So they  _weren’t_  stalkin’  _Dei_ , fuck, the hell’d you do to them?”

Chuushin’s look could have melted glass.  “Hidan. Fuck off. Before I make you.”

“Bitch, please,” ‘Hidan’ shot back with a scoff.  “I’m  _invested_.  Since when did you fucking pick up hotties?  Usually, they fuckin’ run from you!”

A dark brow twitched very faintly.  “It was… informative, running into you, Miss Wei.  Now if you’ll excuse me?” He didn’t wait for the response as he slipped past her and stalked toward the other man.

Hidan was grinning wide enough it looked painful.  “I can take you, fucker.”

For a moment, she was honestly torn. To run away or stay and attempt to talk these two delinquents out of trashing each other in a stuffed toy store. Luckily, as she was hesitating, one of the store’s staff came marching over.

“Alright, are any of you here to buy anything? Or at least browse?” the stocky brunette demanded, fists on hips and scowling thunderously. “If not, please leave.”

Wincing, Tenten caught Hinata’s gaze and jerked her chin at the door. “Time to go, Ino,” she muttered to her other friend. “None of us need to get into trouble over guys.”

Ino nodded quickly, interest thankfully waning with the official presence of the staff.  Beyond her, Chuushin grabbed his friend by the shoulder and started hauling him toward the door without so much as a nod at the clerk.

The rest of them scuttled out with an icy “Thank you” ushering them faster.

At the entrance the groups split ways, Tenten determinedly not looking back. That didn’t mean Ino refrained from glancing over her shoulder, lips barely holding back the giggles.

“I don’t know whether to deny knowing you or buying you a drink,” Tenten muttered as they strolled past storefronts, Hinata was silently giggling under her breath while Ino was a cackling misfit. “You decked him! I can’t believe it!”

Ino tossed her hair over her shoulder and stuck her nose in the air.  “What can I say? I take no prisoners,” she declared, and her smirk echoed their grins.

xXx

The first meeting the Wei’s sent him on could lightly be labelled as a test and most likely categorized as bullshit.

The building was pretentiously overbearing, with too much gilded gold and no matter how well the procurer did his job with the original paintings, they all washed out under the flat lighting. The carpet was new and what bare floor there was had been newly polished.

On the way to the meeting, Kakuzu had been escorted on in a circuitous route that could only have been a tour to showcase prosperity. What he saw instead was a slowly dying entity that chose to show off its plumes rather than its emaciated belly.

Men and women in flawless suits waited for him in the boardroom, nearly flying out of their seats to bow. “Welcome,” they said, smiling on the surface as below the table they wrung their hands.

Those smiles had died a quick and painful death within minutes of Kakuzu hearing what they demanded while offering promises only worth the air it took to breathe them.

The only improvement to his situation was when, on his way out of the boardroom, he received a text from Tenten. [ _If you have time, I’d like to talk to you about the meeting. I’m in the area. Lunch is on me._ ]

It was barely past 9:15. The meeting had been scheduled for 9.

So he shot a text back as the elevator doors closed before him.  [ _I’ll meet you out front, then. On my way down._ ] He was curious.  What exactly would she have in store for him? He doubted they’d wasted much time complaining about him, but he hadn’t expected anything else to begin with.  The whole farce was an irritant; he honestly had no idea why anyone would bother with the fools. What was Serene even thinking? The crafty old woman had to have several layers of ulterior motives to have sent him into that… that  _children’s playhouse_.

Snarling, he strode forward when the elevator beeped and opened, stalking into the lobby proper.  Several people scuttled out of his path, but he paid very little attention.

Tenten was waiting in front of the building for him.

From the look on her face, she was about as unimpressed with the location as he was. “You were out of there faster than even Aunt Serene expected,” she commented in lieu of a greeting. Shaking out her silver umbrella, Tenten nodded down the street. “How do you feel about having barbecue for brunch?”

“Barbecue is fine,” he replied, tugging up his hood.  He gestured for her to start walking. “I stayed longer than I really needed to.  They weren’t worth the effort.”

Hesitating just a bare moment, Tenten glanced over his coat and down to his shoes. He hadn’t dressed up to the highest degree, but he had put in effort. She seemed to register that in a blink and a grimace. “On second thought, I’ll drive,” she decided. Angling for the side as opposed to the main street. “I parked underground.”

Hm.  Interesting.  “Very well. Show me where,” he decided, redirecting his path. Flashing him a tight smile, she led the way down a narrow staircase.

“Thank you, Chuushin-san, for your patience,” was the first thing out of Tenten’s mouth the moment the doors of her cheerful yellow sedan closed, granting them a modicum of privacy. “We knew this was a waste of time, but unfortunately, we do run into these occasionally.”

Meaning, they needed to know how he’d handle these cases. And if he was willing to stick around after what could be construed as a blow to his pride.

He drew a breath and let it out slowly.  “If you knew it was bullshit, why bother entertaining it?  Never mind my play in the situation. Someone else wasting your time is ridiculous.  There’s no point. Testing me is one thing, but you’re not just wasting my time, you’re wasting theirs and yours.  What’s the other motives?” he demanded, trying - as much as he was able - to not sound hostile. He wasn’t sure if he succeeded, but he was honestly curious.

Wrinkling her nose, Tenten side eyed him. “Politics. Someone’s brother. Another one’s desperate investments. An old client’s recommendation. Other times, we simply need to know if it truly is a sinking ship and if so, how soon can we move to buy them out completely?” Thumbing the engine to life, she leaned around to check behind them as she reversed. “Or maybe we want to know if they can surprise us. Perhaps there’s something making the trip out worthwhile. You must have researched them yourself. Why didn’t you contact us with questions before driving out here?”

Unwinding from her contortion, Tenten shot him a slight smile. “Because you couldn’t discount them completely without standing on their grounds. Sometimes, we need to physically be there and meet to truly judge.”

He frowned thoughtfully, and nodded slowly.  “Granted,” he admitted. It was good to know she wasn’t just another over-protected princess.  He slanted her a smirk of his own. “And your motive for getting me lunch?”

“I have no motive.” And didn’t that sound flat? Tenten caught sight of his skeptical expression and huffed. “Aunt told me to make myself available in case you needed to rant. I’m to take notes and present her with your impressions of the company you just left, and my thoughts on your reactions.” The corner of her mouth quirked. “How’s that for transparency?”

Kakuzu snorted.  “You want my impressions?  They’re roadkill, don’t waste your time trying to salvage a dead animal.  There may be people within that I didn’t spot that are worth saving, but the company is not only useless, it’s trying to maintain its image rather than spending that effort in saving what little it has left.  I give it two months, less if someone tries to buy it out.”

Nodding along, Tenten was the perfect image of neutrality. “And here is where I do admit, I’m offering lunch because I am hungry and I didn’t believe Aunt Serene when she said you’d be out of there before half past nine. But also,” she added, “because in my opinion, this is a shitty way of introducing new staff to the job. Thus food as consolation.”

It occurred to him that Hidan would probably love her idea of a consolation prize.  “Are you sure this isn’t just your attempt to bribe me into forgetting your mall-time habits, Miss Wei?” he asked, keeping his expression flat and calm.

Her brow twitched. Remarkably, her driving stayed smooth. “What about my habits, Chuushin-san?”

“I’m sure Hidan’s wrong about you stalking me - or Deidara - because that’s preposterous.  Although I don’t think it’s typical to spot someone and immediately duck for cover,” he replied with a shrug.  “Unless you’re very into stuffed toys?”

Visibly chewing on her lower lip, Tenten pulled out into traffic. ”Alright then. Yes. This is a bribe.”

Kakuzu bit back any sign of triumph.  “Very well. I’ll have the spare ribs, then.”

Clearly disgruntled, she muttered, “I’m holding you to that. And also, I’m not shelling out for another pity post-meeting lunch. This first time is the only occasion.”

“I don’t make a habit of accepting pity, anyway,” he replied just as flatly.  “I’m only accepting now because my roommate stole my wallet.”

A sudden laugh bubbled up from her. “Your roommate sounds fantastic. Why are you with him?”

He considered that.  “Unfortunately, that information will cost you,” he replied mildly.  Because frankly, he didn’t know her well enough to just divulge things like that.  Not how much Hidan meant, despite being an unbearable asswipe some days. How they were the only family each other had.  How, at the end of the day, it had always been them against the world… hell, he’d never told  _Hidan_  how much Hidan meant to him.  Like hell was he giving that information to this girl.  At least, not for free. Or even cheap.

But all Tenten did was roll her eyes. “Fair enough, keep your secrets.” Humming, she guided them through traffic and around the back of a Korean barbecue. “Though, are you alright getting home in this downpour?”

“Yes, I’ll be fine,” he replied with a shrug.  “I have things I need to do downtown after this anyway.”

Going through the motions of parking, Tenten nodded. “Perfect. Then let’s get moving. I could kill for some pork belly.”

**Author's Note:**

> Definitely will get back to this.


End file.
